"I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain." Frank Herbert - Dune

Ten years ago, I wondered if my children were broken forever. If a merry little Christmas was just a bitter joke somebody wrote.

If you're going hiking in one of the many beautiful spots scattered across the Bucks & Montgomery County area, here's some tips I've learned

There are some times when I feel like I have not yet really woken up and started living. Just existing -in a hazy dream, each day passing like so many sounds and colors behind drapes of fabric. I think I know what's happening on the other side. But now and then, I get a glimpse behind the curtain and it looks nothing like I thought. I feel upended and unsure. Maybe I don't know anything at all. The colors are distorted, the sounds are a warning. Was it always that way? Could

When you're soarin' through the air, I'll be your solid ground Take every chance you dare. I'll still be there, When you come back down. Nickel Creek - When You Come Back Down The day you came to Earth was unseasonably warm. It felt that way, at least. I remember it being surreal, the way the sweat clung to this oversized green sweater I was wearing. The sun was glowing deep in the sky and the cows on our neighbor's farm were mooing low and loud. There were thousands of sunfl

And let me crawl inside your veins I'll build a wall, give you a ball and chain It's not like me to be so mean You're all I wanted Just let me hold you Like a hostage Billie Eilish - Hostage I used to keep secret journals all over the place. It was equal parts an obsession with fresh notebooks and a need to put down the weight I carried, sometimes. I have all these pages with little cryptic notes scribbled in them from times my life was feeling dark and heavy. I'm the only on

What's so amazing that keeps us stargazing? What do we think we might see? Some day we'll find it The Rainbow Connection The lovers, the dreamers and me. - Kermit the Frog, Rainbow Connection For some reason, when I was thinking of lyrics to attach to this post, this song popped into my head. And because it's been a while, and because it's Kermit, and because there's never a bad time for muppets, I looked it up on YouTube before starting to write. Reading through the comment

Always just hunting for that near-life experience, In fear of missing something vital from your own existence. All your emotions subconsciously thought out and scripted Less about how you're feeling, More about how you f*#@ing depict it. - Scroobius Pip, Broken Promise I've never been a morning person. But as the school bus pulls away, sometimes I do sit in the quiet glow of light coming through my bedroom window and reflect. Last night, my son asked me if God loves chil

And if I say I really loved you, And was glad you came along, Then you were here today... For you were in my song. - Paul McCartney, Here Today I didn't take this photo. But I love it. Here's the fearless leader of Fountain of Youth - with his phenomenal indie movie reference (The Life Aquatic), his infectious smile and his incomparable embrace of humor, joy and life. There are some people who leave an indelible mark on your universe - transforming forever the way you see th

"I don't want ever to be a man," he said with passion. "I want always to be a little boy and to have fun." - J.M. Barrie, Peter Pan When I was little, one of my favorite places to visit was the library. Every week, I'd ride my bike over and check out all the fairy tales and fantasies I could. The pile, as I waited, would tower above my head and barely zipper into the red backpack my parents gave me on my eighth birthday. My favorite stories were the ones with beautiful illus

When you blow out the candles, One light stays aglow It's the love light in your eyes, Where e'er you go. - Tom Chapin, Happy Birthday Today, my Baby Squid is five years old. My comedic genius, my tough guy, my King T'Challa (he insists that this is his real name). For some reason, five is hard. It's like closing the Baby Chapter and opening the Bye, Mom, I'm Off to College one. Yes, I know this is absurd, and yes, I know I feel like this every year. But holding him all cudd

His lord said unto him, Well done, thou good and faithful servant: thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things: enter thou into the joy of thy lord. Matthew 25:21 My grandmother passed away, unexpectedly, a few days before my wedding. My mom texted me to say that she and my dad were taking her to the hospital. A few hours later, my dad called to tell me that she probably wouldn't live through the night. I hung up the phone and called my

"Oh, that's far," said Big Nutbrown Hare. "That is very, very far." Big Nutbrown Hare settled Little Nutbrown Hare into his bed of leaves. He leaned over and kissed him goodnight. Then he lay down close by and whispered with a smile, "I love you right up to the moon - and back." - Guess How Much I Love You, Sam McBratney The name of the midwife who attended Liam's birth was Moon. Really. Out of six midwives on rotation, there was just one person I hoped against all hopes wou

The cleaning and scrubbing will wait till tomorrow, For children grow up, as I’ve learned to my sorrow. So quiet down, cobwebs. Dust go to sleep. I’m rocking my baby and babies don’t keep. - Song for a Fifth Child, Ruth Hulburt Hamilton Well, First Grade doesn't get any easier. Everyone tells you that it goes by in the blink of an eye, and sadly, it's true. I feel like I'm constantly turning back behind me and trying to make yesterday's memories still fit into my arms. On

Today was a rite of passage in our household. My oldest son proudly donned his backpack and climbed up into the yellow school bus while his younger brother and I stood on the sidewalk and waved. I held back tears as I drove my younger son to daycare. His first day without his big brother around. Last night at bedtime, he told me he felt sad about the change. And I felt sad for him. And hopeful for both of them. And a little sad for myself. Every parent must have this day whe